Thursday, November 20, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, Nov. 23

...'AINT OVER YET BITCHES!!!


Although it is true that The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta was taken off the air by the station owner at Piratecatradio due to a conflict of interest (one could call it hatred if they wanted to) between the station owner and John, we just aren't the type to lay down and quit. We're more the type to pass out, wake up, then wonder how we got home last night.

Anyway, this conflict had been brewing for a long time and finally came to its conclusion last Sunday night with our show being pulled off the air.

But guess what, darlings. The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta 'aint over yet. We will continue on as an internet Webcast until we find a better station or get ourselves on a satellite channel.


NOT ONLY THAT... we are going to be kicking things up a notch by videotaping the show and providing video clips of our favorite guests for your voyeuristic pleasure. So, where you used to only be able to listen to our crazy, illicit antics, now you can watch us (and our wonderful guests). We'll provide video clips of our favorite guests up on our website, on YouTube, and on MySpace.

This Sunday night at 10 pm, we will be streaming some extra special shows. We will play our very first shows together on the JMP with SM (awwww how sweet!). To partake in the nostalgia (and my awkward beginnings as a radio talk show co-host), just go to www.fccfree.com and play the stream (fccfreeradio.com).

This feed and our upcoming live feeds has been provided by www.fccfreeradio.com and www.shoutcastradio.com. Tune in (er, log on) this Sunday night starting at 8 pm – 12 am on fccfree.com for some really great shows. We will soon resume our hot, hilarious, and uncensored live comedy talk shows on our hot webcast (with video clips) starting in about 2 weeks.

Stay tuned for more exciting and risqué blogs that will announce our upcoming guests.

We love you and appreciate your continued support as our beloved, loyal listeners.

Susan
www.fccfreeradio.com/
www.shoutcastradio.com/
www.thejohnmillerprogram.com/
www.susanmaletta.com/

Tuesday, November 4, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, Nov. 9

We are now the Number 1 most listened to and most played back show at PirateCat Radio. Congratulations to us!!!

Big props (and big jugs) to Cheril Vendetti (she has big jugs), Adam McLaughlin (he's funny), Ben Feldman (we love you very much), and John Brown (prank call master) for making us Pee with Glee last week! Now go and play back the show and listen to it before it's gone! http://www.fccfree.com/. Shows only stay on the website one week. Don't miss out.

Check this out, sexy bitches. This show is going to be magical. No magicians or optical illusions or sawing people in half (although someone may end up juggling their nuts). This show is going to be about deliciously mischievous and revealing conversation, enriching educational opportunities, and we may just pull a rabbit out of someone’s ass, who knows.

We now have a regular awesome weekly segment on the show --

Raucous Rants with Will Durst! That’s right, local celebrity comedian and author, and "Quite Possibly the Best Political Satirist Today" -- New York Times....Will Durst has a regular home with us here on the JMP! He’ll be bringing our loyal listeners insightful, at times cynical, but always delightful and witty political commentary on today’s newsworthy events every single Sunday night on our show.

Our first guest,
Rob Little, is an old friend of the JMP. Rob’s a sketch comedy player on The Best Damn Sports Show Period and Last Call with Carson Daly. He headlines clubs and colleges all over the country, has appeared in national television commercials and on such shows as Strictly Sex with Dr. Drew, Comedy Central's Distraction, Fox News, and SiTV's Latino Laugh Festival. Rob's comedy CD, Born 20 Inches Long, is another testament to his talent and status as a comedic force. The Detroit Free press selected him as Michigan's "Best up and Coming Comedian," and was a finalist in both the Seattle and San Francisco International Comedy Competitions. Rob was also selected as a feature performer at the Chicago Comedy Festival along with the Boston Comedy and Movie Festival.

Next up, we are thrilled to have
Will Franken back on the show! Franken’s humor is rooted in the British sketch comedy tradition. Onstage, he portrays an eclectic mix of characters through a series of interconnected vignettes. His skits are often satirical, skewering a range of subcultures and political views. In 2005, the SF Weekly selected Franken as Best Comedian, the San Francisco Bay Guardian calls him the Best Alternative to Psychedelic Drugs, and Tribe.net named him one of the Top 25 People to Watch nationwide.

And finally on the JMP… we welcome the very funny comedian and expert ice cream scooper, Caitlin Gill!


A rising talent in the San Francisco comedy scene, people are talking about
Caitlin Gill. Most of those are people stuck in conversations with her father, who is really, really excited about his daughter telling dirty jokes in clubs. Since beginning her career in May of 2007, Caitlin has performed all over town, and is a regular at the San Francisco Punchline on Sunday nights. She is also the host of the "For Ladies Only" Open Mic at the Brainwash, and the "For Ladies Only" Showcase at Club Deluxe. Her style twists her personal experiences into engaging bits and stories, and drops phrases in your ear that will later litter your lexicon. Let me tell you something, kids…this lady is fucking hilarious. You have no idea.

Now unbuckle your overalls, spit your chewing tobacco out, and take a very long, hot shower. We want you clean and ready for us.

Tune in! Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATECATRADIO.COM, THEJOHN MILLERPROGRAM.COM and FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in. Tell us how much you love us. Don’t hold your emotions inside! 415-341-1199.




Monday, October 27, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, November 2

Last Sunday night we were lucky to have a fascinating chat with the world's most famous houseguest and finalist in the new "Gimme My Reality Show" contest on FOX, Kato Kaelin!

We got to hear all about his recent visit to the Playboy Mansion for the Halloween Party, and we also learned Kato's opinions on the latest happenings with none other than, you guessed it, OJ Simpson! Be intrigued! Download the conversation on http://www.fccfree.com/. Big thanks to Kato Kaelin, Rob Brackenridge, Eric Steele, Justin Lamb, Chad Lehrman, Kaseem Bentley, and Jabari Davis for coming in to entertain us. As usual, we had a blast!

This week, another great line-up of jokers and jesters, starting with one very funny lady who's cooking up the comedy as well as the tasty cuisine...Cheril Vendetti!

Cheril Vendetti is a seasoned and much sought after comedienne on America’s comedy circuit, where her bookings keep her on the road for most of the year. When in Los Angeles, she is a regular at the world famous Comedy Store in Hollywood, and recently appeared in the “The Main Room,” a documentary about the club. She received a Clio award for playing an Italian cook in a Foster Farm commercial, and has appeared on HBO’s Real Sex (thankfully, fully clothed). It was on stage at NATPE where talent agent David Tenzer of CAA began to represent Miss Vendetti and her cooking show “I Got Your Recipes..Right Here!!” It was also on that stage where she got to create two TV pilots “The Queen of New Jersey” and “Queen of the Road.” Miss Vendetti has just completed a comical cookbook, “Mistress of the Mob Cuisine.”

Next up we are happy to welcome two very funny local comedians back to the studio, John Brown and Adam McLaughlin!

The city of Santa Cruz, California generates some pretty weird people and comedian John Brown certainly qualifies as one of funniest weirdos around. John represents his hometown well by amusing audiences with bizarre impressions such as E.T. (from the movie “E.T.”) and San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsome. He’s also been having fun and keeping busy annoying anonymous people by making some really wild crank calls. (One might think he’s actually high on crank when making these calls, but who’s to say?) John also recently started up a comedy showcase at Boardwalk Bowl in Santa Cruz on Tuesday nights at 9 pm and he’s a regular at the San Francisco Punchline on Sunday nights.

Adam McLaughlin has been keeping audiences in stitches in shows throughout the bay area. He uses witty social satire and captivating characters to create hilariously theatrical performances that leave audiences cheering for more. Adam is regular at the San Francisco Comedy College Clubhouse, where he co-hosts the Scantily Clad Comedy showcase and teaches stand-up comedy classes to teenagers (http://www.kidscomedy.org/). He has written and appeared in numerous videos on seesmic.com and is a semi-finalist in the Rooster T. Feathers Comedy Competition.

And finally...what do Sia Amma and Ben Feldman share in common? Well…let’s see..they’re both comedians…they both enjoy discussing women’s sexuality…and…well, they’re both circumcised.

Sia Amma has been featured on KQED two times and has been quoted in comedy clubs around the Bay Area more times than any other comedian. In her shows, Sia examines sexual attitudes towards women's sexuality and empowers and educates the general public on the issue of female circumcision. In 1998, she started touring the country with her one-woman show called "In Search of My Clitoris" and "Clitoris Celebration -- Think Outside the Box”. Her shows are a clever combination of stand-up comedy and theater that is funny, playful, and sexuality informative. Sia's newest presentation geared towards mothers and daughters is called "What Mama Said About Down There." Sia also produces and hosts many shows throughout the week at Our Little Theater in San Francisco.

Ben Feldman is four parts white on his parents side. He was born with taste buds on his penis (which is usually quite enjoyable to him except when he burns it on pizza). He is a very popular local comedian in the San Francisco Bay Area and he hosts and runs several shows, including the monthly comedy showcase, “Laugh Orgy”, which happens the second Wednesday of every month at San Francisco’s Grant & Green Saloon. He also hosts "The Joke Show" on Tuesday nights at the same saloon. Hey, you know if you are going to a "saloon" you are going to have fun. Ben has also produced and hosted several other recurring or one-time comedy shows over the years. Ben is truly edgy and shocking, some would say disturbing, but we say he’s delightful.

Now drop and give me twenty. Not push-ups...dollars.
Unless you Really want to do 20 push-ups.
In that case, make sure you are naked and on top of me.

Tune in! Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATECATRADIO.COM, THEJOHN MILLERPROGRAM.COM and FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in or I'll bite your nipple. 415-341-1199.

Monday, October 20, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, October 26

What’s the deal with comedians getting punched in the face???

On Sunday night, one of our local comedians and esteemed peers came into the studio with a big ole' SHINER! Can you guess which of our comedian friends CORRECTED THE ENGLISH of a homeless guy in San Francisco and then got cracked in the face? Your choices include Bernie Lubbers, Kurt Weitzman, Amir Malekepour, David “The Wiz” Wiswell, and Nathan Jackson. So who do you think got the beat down? Download the last show at
www.fccfree.com to find out. Then please go and buy him a beer and a really sensitive Hallmark card.

This Sunday night (drum roll please...).......KATO KAELIN's coming back on the show! Kato is currently working on getting his own reality show with FOX reality channel's "GIMME MY REALITY SHOW". We want everyone to tell their friends and families to check out Kato's new 90-second viral video then vote for him! Voting starts this Sunday, Oct. 26th until Nov. 2. Please, loyal listeners, help our buddy out. Watch and vote for Kato Kaelin.

Also on the program this Sunday night, we welcome the very funny, Rob Brackenridge!

Always the class clown (and spending most of his formative years in the principal's office),
Rob Brackenridge was destined to become a comedian. Born and raised in Wisconsin, Rob has been based out of Los Angeles since 1992 and spends most of the year on the road, "bringing the funny" to audiences around the world. He tours regularly for the U.S. troops on the Miller Lite "Lite Laffs" program, and his television credits include Comedy Central's “Make Me Laugh” and “Stand-Up, Stand-Up”. He is a favorite at the Improv, the Comedy Store, and Catch a Rising Star.

Next up on the JMP, we are pleased to bring you a very funny radio personality and comedian – Eric “The Real Deal, Man of Steele”!

Born and raised in the capital of the corn-belt, Iowa, Eric Steele graduated from a St. Ambrose University on the border of Iowa and Illinois where he got his start in radio at his college radio station. KRTY's resident rocker worked at rock stations in Iowa before making the leap to LA to pursue comedy gold. In 2006, he moved to the bay area. After hearing about a talent competition KRTY was doing at Club Rodeo, Eric performed and won a qualifying week. He turned his win into a promotional job and then triumphantly resurrected his radio career. His main goal is to have fun while entertaining KRTY's loyal listeners. His life is lived to make people smile. You can also see Eric do stand-up comedy at many of the bay area comedy clubs. His business card describes him best "Writer, Comedian, Golden Voice, and Lover?"

And finally, we are pleased to bring you -- Chad Lehrman and Justin Lamb!

After 9/11,
Chad Lehrman decided to make some changes in his life. He had been doing some web design for the Taliban in Afghanistan when he realized “Hey I'm an American Jew. How did I get here?” So he got the hell out of there before the U.S. came and he went up to Uzbekistan. Unhappy there, he took the next camel he could find to Kyrgyzstan. He had some women troubles there and stole a van to Tajkistan. He kept going and ended up full-circle back in Afghanistan. He was running low on funds so he caught a cheap flight to Barcelona where life is a lot more simple and he has a really big TV and high speed internet and a neat game on his cell phone. Plus, he found a kind Spanish woman with large breasts who really understands him.

Justin Lamb is a San Francisco based stand-up comedian. He was a top 10 finalist in the 2008 Rooster T. Feather’s comedy competition and is member of the comedy group SPF7. He dreams of one day having the time to care for a pet.

Put your feet up and place them firmly in the stirrups.
Open your legs wiiiide, that’s it... yes, that’s good!
Now scoot your bottom all the way forward on the table please.


Tune in! Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATECATRADIO.COM, THEJOHN MILLERPROGRAM.COM and FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in already, Punk Bee-yotch! 415-341-1199.

Monday, October 13, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, October 19


If I had just one day off, I’d grab a pillow and blanket and curl up into one of Chris Storin’s dimples and take a long and peaceful nap. Chris has more dimples than Oprah’s ass, OK?


Chris is also funnier than most people, so it doesn’t matter that you can’t see his dimples through the radio. However, just you knowing that he has the best dimples on the planet is satisfying enough for me. I don’t even care if you understand how funny he is. But if you care about feeling happy inside and if you enjoy the feeling of genuine laughter, download the latest show at
www.fccfree.com.

We also had a lot of laughs with the writer for the Jay Leno show, Phil Perrier from Hollywood! He’s not only funny but he can be really gross, and John and I absolutely love that. (Grosser the better.) We also had on the lovely and talented Kenny Altman and the weird and wonderful Danny Dechi!

Guess what?!

I got to sexually violate Danny Dechi’s asshole with a #2 pencil! Don't get upset, I put the eraser part in first, not the sharpened part. I just wanted to see if it really was truly a “Number 2” pencil. Turns out, not only did I learn that it was, indeed, a real Number 2 pencil, but I also learned that I can play KC & The Sunshine Band’s “Shake Your Booty” pretty well inside Danny’s ass! God, I am so talented. A musical genius!

Just kidding. I went nowhere near Danny Dechi's asshole. (I asked him if I could, but he said No.)

First up on the JMP this Sunday night, we'll chat with Bernie Lubbers! Bernie is a hilarious national touring comedian, public speaker, and corporate humorist, and he's the famous Whiskey Professor! As Whiskey Professor, Bernie speaks and presents for KNOB CREEK and Beam Global Sprits & Wine. He's the celebrity face of the brands for the east coast and presents to national media as well as whiskey and bourbon festivals in Kentucky, New York, Philadelphia, Tampa and Southern Florida, Tennessee, and many other cities. Bernie's also done numerous national/regional television and radio shows, such as The Bob & Tom Show, where he's been a regular guest for more than 12 years (6 million listeners nationwide).

Now get ready to babysit with us, we have some children comedians coming to the show. Well, they aren’t really children really, but …pretty fuckin’ close. I am not even sure we can say “fuckin’” around them. FUCK!!! (Sorry.)

Nathan Jackson is a young and very funny up-and-coming stand-up comedian in the San Francisco scene, performing at clubs and colleges between California and New York. His unique twists on everyday observations and social commentary will be sure to have you laughing. Nathan was a finalist in the San Francisco Comedy Competition, beating out over 90 other comics, and he has also performed with big names such as Arj Barker. And..on a separate note...Nathan is so white, he could be my brother. Good thing the walls are painted black at the radio studio and not white or we'd never find him! This guy is so Republican, he could be my father! This guy is so young, he's even too young for me!

At just 20 years old, the next Barely Legal comic on the show is named David Wiswell. Young David hit the San Francisco comedy scene in 2004. Since then, he tied for first place in MTV’s 2005 San Francisco “Yo’ Mama!” Competition. He also reached the finals of the Twisted Sea Biscuit Contest, the Brainwash Comedy Contest, and the San Francisco Comedy Club Competition. With material ranging from his love of children to his hatred of the Pope, David displays an interesting view of morality and logic that will leave you questioning both yours and his. David will be recording his independent comedy album “Damn Glad to be Here!” so come see the sensation that’s been sweeping the floor.

Also joining us this week, a favorite of the JMP, wacky and wonderful Kurt Weitzman alongside sweet and silly Amir Malekepour!

Amir Malekpour's comedy ranges from intellectual to the absurd. Growing in a diverse family and educational background, his comedy has developed into a unique perspective that has been making audiences laugh in clubs and colleges. His mix of high energy, unique perspective, friendly nature, and smart writing cover such topics as family, relationships, arts, sciences, health, and everyday quirks.

Kurt Weitzmann has been performing comedy for over 15 years and his act has been seen on Comedy Central, MTV, and on the stages of every San Francisco comedy club ever to come or go. Kurt Weitzmann created, edited, and produced the ingenious "SF Weakly", a highly celebrated parody of the SF Weekly, for which he was labeled a comic genius by non other than The SF Weekly. Kurt Weitzmanns comedy sketch album TALENTED is now available on AMERICAN DREAMS RECORDS. Kurt is also the producer of the new hit film "Last Call" and co-creator of the very popular and funny "Jesus Roast" and "Hitler Roast". Kurt is also a regular performer at the SF Punchline.

Shake what your mama gave ya. (But please don't knock my eye out.)

Tune in! Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATECATRADIO.COM, THEJOHN MILLERPROGRAM.COM and FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in at 415-341-1199! Don't freak out. It's easy. One hand goes on your phone, the other hand goes on your weiner.

Or, just use your Bluetooth device. One hand goes on your weiner, the other hand goes on your steering wheel. (Why do you think they came up with the Hands-Free law?)

Monday, October 6, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, October 12

Do you want to know if you spent your time wisely last Sunday night? Take a close look at your radio. Is it sticky? No? Then you obviously didn’t hear the whole radio show.

Go grab a towel, grab that bottle of kissable cherry-flavored massage oil, then download the hotness and hilarity of our wonderful night with Steve Caminiti, Chris Hymes, Dave Burleigh, and Squid (
www.fccfree.com). Our guests made us laugh so hard, our cheeks hurt! (Our faces were pretty sore too.)

This Sunday night we honor Joan Rivers on her birthday! We’ll be celebrating in style with both comedy and fashion, darling. That’s right, we’ll be striking poses with clown noses. We’ll be sporting the latest fall fashions, such as timeless, eye-catching pieces from our own private collections including pre-shrunk cotton, stoner-washed denim, and eco-friendly hemp sweat-suits. High fashion baby! We’ll also strut around wearing QVC bling.

First up on the JMP, Phil Perrier from Hollywood is back on the show!

Phil Perrier is a hilarious national touring stand-up comedian and writer for the Jay Leno show. He started with All Comedy Radio in the spring of 2003 and was syndicated on 37+ stations in the United States, 23+ stations in Canada, and one station in South Africa. He is best known for the Hollywood Report "Limited Access", Recurring Sketches: "Interview with a Dead Guy", "Celebrity Sodium Pentothal", "Wisdom of the Ages, with Ceepak Okra", and "Oblivious Witness to History". In 1990, Phil started writing jokes for Jay Leno & "The Tonight Show" and still to this day writes for Jay. In 1999, he started writing for his first Nationally Syndicated radio show "Bob and Tom's Big Show”. In 2001, he began writing for Martin Short and "The Martin Short Show". Ten years after he started writing for Jay Leno, Phil Perrier also started writing for David Letterman & "The Late Show". Phil still writes for both shows. Phil has also been a columnist for many newspapers including the L.A. Daily News, Washington Times, San Francisco Examiner, Baltimore Sun, Philadelphia Inquirer, Cleveland Plain Dealer, Atlanta Journal-Constitution, Birmingham News, JewishWorldReview.com and, last but not least, he was a Staff Writer for the Athens (Ga.) Observer from 1993-2000.

Next up on the program, we welcome Butch Escobar!

Butch Escobar hosts a kick-ass monthly showcase at the San Jose Improv on the 4th Wednesday of every month called “Butch Escobar’s Unfiltered Underground.” Butch also has hosted and featured in Big Al’s Big Ass Comedy Show, another great show you can catch at the Improv. You can see Butch perform at other great venues around the South Bay and it’s a guarantee that any of the shows he’s involved in is going to be a great time. Butch is great—he tells it like it is and does not censor himself by any means. And, it’s a well known fact, we’re all about not censoring yourself on the JMP. We can’t wait to talk about anything and everything with him!

Rounding off the evening, we have Danny Dechi and Kenny Altman on the show!

Danny Dechi's stand-up comedy has been described as Woody Allen doing vaudeville. His humor, most often directed at himself, is a quirky combination of clean comedy and a unique #2 pencil musical act. Danny arrived to the Bay Area from Argentina when he was only 6 years old. His grandfather moved to Argentina because he heard America is a land of opportunity. Unfortunately, he had the wrong America. The experience of growing up in San Francisco has warped Danny Dechi forever. He's been an enthusiastic element of San Francisco's weird and wonderful performing scene for more than 7 years. He can perform any tunes, from rock-n-roll to classical pieces, by drumming a #2 pencil on his cheek, and is considering recording his first musical CD. Danny is the author of the hilarious book: "I Didn't Want to Pay for a Rent-A-Car". Danny was also inducted into the 24th edition of “Who’s Who in the East”.

Kenny Altman is a gay, religious, rock and roll Jew, and he misses his 1975 Toyota Corolla and his house in New Jersey! He smokes one cigarette a year, and he really, really, really enjoys that one cigarette! He’s due for another one around June '09. He is San Francisco's only stand-up comic and Torah Trope instructor. Really, do you need to know more than that?!

Squat down over my camera and let me take a picture. (
But please don't say "Cheese".)

Tune in!

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATECATRADIO.COM, THEJOHN MILLERPROGRAM.COM and FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in at 415-341-1199! Your father didn't raise no pussy. (He didn't get any either.)



Monday, September 29, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, October 5

We want to thank all of our loyal listeners for tuning in each week. We love you, and we mean that in the most sexual way. This week, we promise that the show will NOT be cancelled! We were just too damn tired after Comedy Day to do anything except eat a bunch of spaghetti and pass out. (Someone must have spiked our brownies at Comedy Day.)

First up on the JMP this week, we have
Steve Caminiti coming in to make us giggle. Steve was voted Funniest Man in Cincinnati by his peers, Funniest Person in Ohio by Showtime Cable Network, and picked as Best Comedian in Cincinnati by both Cincinnati Magazine and City Beat Magazine. Steve is also a regular visitor on nationally syndicated talk shows, such as Bob & Tom and The Gary Burbank Show, and he was featured in Rolling Stone Magazine’s Comedy Issue. His television appearances include Comedy Central, CBS television’s "48 Hours", Showtime Cable Network, The Nashville Network, A&E, and MTV.

Recently added to this Sunday's show, we will have Chris Hymes in the studio. Chris is a very funny comedian and host to some of the best comedy shows in the area.


And finally, we have a couple heavyweights coming in to make us remember how to laugh really hard. We are more than thrilled to bring you two amazing talents, master impressionist (and really, really good looking) Dave Burleigh and his sidekick, Squid! It’s going to be a night of hilarious impressions and musical comedy! Yay!

Dave Burleigh has been amazing audiences literally all over the world with his clever and clean comedy for over 15 years. He has recently joined forces with two other successful comedians to create the Three of a Kind Comedy Tour. Dave has taken the lost art form of impressions to a new level by often inviting the crowd to offer up requests during his stand up routine, and is always looking to add new and current voices to his act. This rising star has opened for Robin Williams, Dana Carvey, and George Lopez and covers such topics as current events, sports, politics, music and everyday life, usually while incorporating one of his spot-on impressions.

Put on your bath robe and leave it slightly open in the front.

Tune in! And call in during Dave Burleigh and Squid’s segment. Challenge him by making requests for unique celebrity voices.

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATECATRADIO.COM, THEJOHN MILLERPROGRAM.COM and FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in 415-341-1199. Don’t be a sissy.

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, September 28

This Sunday night we celebrate the birthdays of Janeane Garofalo (Sept. 28, 1964), Ed Sullivan (Sept. 28, 1902), and Italy's famous bad boy, Caravaggio (Sept. 28, 1573)! We relate to Caravaggio here at the John Miller Program because although Caravaggio's dramatic intensity was appreciated back in his day, his realism was seen by some as unacceptably vulgar. We say Bravo, Vaggi, for not giving a shit, for being a true artist, and for being true to yourself. Oh, and rest in peace.

This Sunday, Comedy Day becomes Comedy Night, and it's gonna be a party. We've got Will Durst. We've got Grace White. We've got Rebecca Arthur. And we've got Joe Gleckler. All combined, they make up one potent blend of high-grade, euphoria-inducing, medicinal-assisting laughter all wrapped up into one giant fatty known as the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta.

As the sacred cows routinely paint targets on their foreheads practically begging for someone to puncture their pomposity, America cries out for a man with the aim, strength, and style to hit them where it hurts the funniest.
Will Durst is that man. Sweeping both sides of the aisle with a quiver full of arrows dipped in common sense, Durst transcends party ties, having performed at events honoring former Presidents Bill Clinton and George HW Bush as well as acclaimed appearances at both a Mayors Convention and Governors Conference. Outraged and outrageous, Durst is as current as today’s headlines, as accurate as a sniper, and universally acknowledged by even his peers as the nation’s foremost political comic.

Grace White, a.k.a. “That Old Hippie Chick”, is a classic bohemian with a mother who stalks her, a father to whom road rage is an art-form, and a stand-up comedy act like no other. White launched her comedy career at the onset of her "Middle Ages," and has gone on to open for such musical acts as 3 Doors Down, Starship, Edgar Winter, Leon Russell, and Jethro Tull, as well as comedians Kevin Pollack, Jack Mayberry, Rocky LaPorte, and Father Guido Sarducci. Her television credits include appearances on "Good Morning America" and the "Jerry Lewis Muscular Dystrophy Telethon," she made her film debut in "The Independent," starring Jerry Stiller and Janeane Garofalo, and she's made thousands of fans laugh in Golden Gate Park from the stage of San Francisco's long-running annual "Comedy Day" celebration. White’s all female comedy tour, Women Who Kick Comedy Butt, has toured nationally and is now making plans to take over the planet. That Old Hippie Chick may not be the last of her tribe, but she is surely one of the most entertaining.

An angry 6'4"
Rebecca Arthur lumbers onto the stage looking as if she were about to audition for Godzilla’s bride. She plants herself meaningfully in the middle of the stage and glares at her audience. Finally when the laughter fades, without a hint of a smile on her face, the TALL COMIC delivers humor so dry it could suck the water out of an Olympic-sized pool. Since winning California’s Funniest Female Contest, which included over 120 funny females, Rebecca has gone on to perform her comedy act from Los Angeles to New York. She has also been featured on “Last Comic Standing” and on TLC’s “Faking It”.

Joe Gleckler has been performing comedy in and around the Bay Area for the past 4 years at Cobb’s Comedy Club, Rooster T. Feather’s, Tommy T’s, and numerous other venues. He’s hosted many shows in San Francisco, most regularly at Our Little Theater. Joe's performances are infused with a multitude of influences: growing up in Baltimore, being raised by a preacher and former missionary, teaching English as a second language, being married, and being pop-culture illiterate. Seeing Joe perform will change your life. Watch him, then give up.

Break out the strawberries, whipped cream, and duct tape. It's time to party.

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

Turn your radio on to 87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or http://www.piratecatradio.com/, http://www.fccfree.com/ and http://www.thejohnmillerprogram.com/ every Sunday night at 10pm! Not in SF or LA? Listen to our live stream on fccfree.com.


Call in (what, are you afraid we might have phone sex?) 415-341-1199.


Try it baby, you might like it.







Monday, September 15, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, September 21

If you can’t take the heat, get yo' ass out the kitchen. (We're on a mission.)

Thanks to last Sunday night's guests for putting some sizzle into our pan. Getting things cookin', we started off with an enticing appetizer, Casey the Intern. (He was prepared with a special type of mushrooms.) We continued on with a scrumptious side dish, Greg Edwards. (He has a creamy filling but he claims it's low in fat and high in protein). Next, we got to toss Dana Lovecchio's salad. (OH!) (It's nut-free.) After that, we brought out the main course, Robert Hawkins. (Full o’ beans. Literally.) Alongside him, a special guest comedian. (Mystery Meat.) And finally, the dessert, Marty Grimes! So put your bib on and get ready to chow down on this delicious assortment from http://www.fccfree.com/. Now that’s good eatin’. It's Yum Yum for your Tum Tum!

First up this Sunday, we have Dan Friedman. After seven years of college, six different majors, and 235 credit hours, Dan packed it and hit the road doing what he knew he did best--making people laugh. It was in 1991 when he got his first break as the house MC for Ray Comb's Cincinnati Comedy Connection. Since then, the 37 year old Cincinnati native has worked selectively around his home state. He has taken his comedy to club stages in Cleveland, Buffalo, Columbus, as well as colleges such as Penn State and Iowa University. Dan gives his audience a high-energy show with a laid-back flavor. With minimal blue material, he covers such topics as growing up an only child, sports, Judaism, college, sex, drugs,and politics. Dan currently Lives in Los Angeles and performs regulary in the area and monthly at The Venice Whaler.

Next up on the JMP, we have David Wiswell, Nathan Jackson, Chris Hymes, and Joe Klocek entertaining us.

Joe Klocek has become one of San Francisco's most unique comics. Using his razor-sharp wit, Joe 'works the crowd' to the delight of audiences all over the SF bay area and beyond. Joe is in high demand at clubs and corporate functions. Raised in the midwest, but now a confirmed San Francisco resident, Joe brings a refreshing look at life through the eyes of a class clown who read too much. You can catch Joe on Comedy Central’s “Live at Gotham” and also at the Punchline in San Francisco, where Joe created and hosted the hilarious “Get It!? A Stand-up Comedy Game Show”.

At just 20 years old, David Wiswell hit the San Francisco comedy scene in 2004. He tied for first place in MTV’s 2005 San Francisco “Yo’ Mama!” Competition. He also reached the finals of the Twisted Sea Biscuit Contest, the Brainwash Comedy Contest, and the San Francisco Comedy Club Competition. With material ranging from his love of children to his hatred of the Pope, David will display an interesting view of morality and logic that will leave you questioning both yours and his. David will be recording his independent comedy album “Damn Glad to be Here!” so come see the sensation that’s been sweeping the floor.

Nathan Jackson is another young and very funny comic and he's up-and-comer in the San Francisco scene, performing at clubs and colleges between here and New York. His unique twists on everyday observations and social commentary will be sure to have you laughing. Nathan’s been a finalist in the San Francisco Comedy Competition beating out over 90 other comics and has performed with such big names like Arj Barker from HBO’s “Flight of the Concords”.

On a separate note...Nathan is so white, he could be my brother. Good thing the walls are painted black at the radio studio and not white or we'd never find him. This guy is so Republican, he could be my father! This guy is so young, he's even too young for me!

Recently added to this Sunday's show, we will have Chris Hymes in the studio. Chris is a very funny comedian and host to some of the best comedy shows in the area.

Slip into something more comfortable.

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

Turn your radio on to 87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or http://www.piratecatradio.com/, http://www.fccfree.com/ and http://www.thejohnmillerprogram.com/ every Sunday night at 10pm! Not in SF or LA? Listen to our live stream on fccfree.com.

Call in (you yellow-bellied voyeur) 415-341-1199.







Monday, September 8, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, September 14

Throw your hands up in the air and wave them around like you just don’t care, OR, put your hands in your lap and play with yourself until you take a nap. (We don’t give a crap.)

Big props to last week’s guests who brought the silly—the wife of the wacky Gilligan (of the hit TV show "Gilligan’s Island") Dreama Denver, Kevin Munroe, Jeff Applebaum, Big Al Gonzales, and a horny call-in guest. Drop it like it’s hot from
www.fccfree.com. (And a big shout out to my Nilla, John Milla! Because I like shouting at him.)

Robert Hawkins is a top-notch celebrity comedian who has been on Comedy Central’s Premium Blend as well as his own half hour special, “Robert Hawkins Live at the San Francisco Punchline” (also out on DVD), which plays regularly on Comedy Central. Hawkins worked as a sketch writer for the Johnny Steele Morning Radio Show and a clever and unique set at the Just For Laughs Comedy Festival in Montreal garnered him a development deal with the FOX network. Hawkins worked as a story editor for the FOX sitcom, “Titus”, where his creativity prompted the show’s producers to cast him in a recurring guest role as the lowlife brother-in-outlaw, “Michael”. Late Night with Conan O’Brien followed, along with appearances on Showtime, A&E, and The Bob and Tom Radio Show. Robert Hawkins continues to tour and has recorded two CDs: "Smackin' Kittens" and "Serious."

Marty Grimes is a charming, witty, and absolutely loveable rising comedy star. Having placed 2nd among more than 140 comics at the 2007 Rooster T. Feathers Amateur Comedy Competition, Marty is commanding stages and keeling people over with laughter left and right. Marty performed a guest set in “On The Rocks with Danny Leary” at Club Octavia and also did a guest set with Jim David at Rooster T. Feathers, and has performed at many venues throughout the Bay Area.

Greg Edwards was born and raised in Newport News, Virginia, where he learned everything—the “Game”, style, love & relationships, spirituality, and most importantly, life. Now he lives in the bay area in Oakland and he’s loving every bit of it. He is a talented and funny stand-up comic and loves being able to get on stage and say anything on his mind as well as working out new jokes and making them hilarious. Greg Edwards opened for Paul Mooney at the Sacramento Punchline and is also a regular crowd pleaser at the SF Punchline. Greg is also an actor who played the lead in Primitive Screwheads’ stage production of Night of the Living Dead.

Also joining us, we have the awesome and beautiful
Dana Lovecchio on the show. She has a wonderful stage presence and consistently brings the heat to any show she’s in. Dana was a finalist in both the “For Ladies Only” comedy contest (Club Deluxe) and the “Hey Lady” comedy contest (San Jose Improv). She has toured with the stand-up comedy troupe “5 Funny Females” and regularly WOWs audiences all over the SF bay area. Dana’s a real crowd pleaser and a real sweetie pie so you don’t want to miss out on her.

Aw Suki Suki now!


Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

Turn your radio on to 87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or
www.piratecatradio.com, www.fccfree.com and www.thejohnmillerprogram.com every Sunday night at 10pm! Not in SF or LA? Listen to our live stream on fccfree.com.

Call in (drink Jägermeister to muster up the courage, you alcoholic) 415-341-1199.








Monday, September 1, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, September 7

Thanks to our guests who entertained us last week, including Kira Soltanovich, Drennon Davis, Jason Downs, Michael Hyde, and Adam McLaughlin. You can catch all the fun again by simply downloading last week's show from http://www.fccfree.com/. Hear about the juicy behind-the-scenes action at the taping of this year's Last Comic Standing in San Francisco.

Why is Sunday, September 7th so special? Because not only is it the birthday of Gloria Gaynor (singer of "I Will Survive," the best break-up song EVER and my favorite karaoke pick), but it is also the night of some of the shiniest rising stars around---Jeff Applebaum, Kevin Munroe, and Big Al Gonzales!

New York City native, Jeff Applebaum examines his life experiences, which include being the only white kid on his Little League team in Queens, having a Chinese wife who orders from take-out menus in fluent Mandarin, and raising a pre-teen son who calls himself “Jewnese,” because he says it sounds better than “Chine-ish.” Jeff recently made his national TV debut on CBS as a comedian on the "Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson." Jeff also played the principal role of Joey Bishop in the long-running musical tribute "The Rat Pack Is Back," in San Francisco, Chicago, and Las Vegas. Jeff is also credited and appears in the blockbuster film "The Pursuit of Happyness," starring Will Smith. Jeff has been entertaining people all around North America for over 12 years, including audiences of more than 10,000 people at the ARCO Arena (in Sacramento) and the Anaheim Convention Center. Jeff won the "Comedian of the Year - 2003" in the SF Bay Area Cabaret Competition.

Kevin Munroe is a very tall and very funny comedian originally from...well...we don't know exactly where he's from because he won't exactly say. But he has a Carribbean accent and listening to him reminds you of a lazy, tropical beach and one very, VERY potent tropical drink. Kevin was a finalist in this year’s Rooster T. Feathers Annual Comedy Competition and he's a favorite in the SF comedy scene. Kevin also produced the long running “Ebony & Irony” show. He's an amazing talent and also just a really cool person. You can catch Kevin at all the major comedy clubs in the area and he makes regular appearances at the SF Punchline on Sunday nights.


Finally, we welcome back another very funny and popular comedian and a regular guest on the John Miller Program, Big Al Gonzales. If you are a comic in this area, you know that everywhere you go, you're gonna run into Big Al Gonzales and he's gonna be working his ass off. He has a great work ethic and everyone can learn something from him. Big Al produces, books, and performs in some of the biggest and best comedy clubs in the SF bay area, including the San Jose Improv and Club Deluxe. Big Al is also a regular at the SF Punchline and Rooster T. Feathers in Sunnyvale, he performed with Big City Improv for four years and was voted Best in the Bay (2002). Recently Big Al featured with with Rich Vos at Rooster T. Feathers and he produced and headlined the popular Fiesta de Comedy Show at the San Jose Improv.

We're going to be asking Big Al questions about the Do's and Don'ts of the comedy business in this area and gain some valuable insights into what it takes to succeed at the best clubs around. Call in with any questions.

Tune in!

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATECATRADIO.COM, FCCFREE.COM and THEJOHNMILLERPROGRAM.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in (if you have any balls at all) 415-341-1199.

(Coming soon to the JMP... favorite celebrity guest of the JMP... Robert Hawkins!!! Mark September 14th down on your calendars.)

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, August 31

It's a good thing I wore my lucky yellow panties to the radio show last week, because I laughed so hard, I peed in my pants! I mean, I'm not really sure if I peed....all I know is… suddenly I felt a really comfortable and warm sensation between my legs. Maybe it was pee, maybe it was something else! I'm just not sure. So, thanks to Will Franken, Scotch Wichmann, Grant Lyon, and Sal Calanni for giving me a rush of excitement that I won’t soon forget. Get excited. Go to http://www.fccfree.com/ and download last week's show.

Next week we have more heavy hitters, yep, an all-star line-up of professional, touring headliners and it will be a night of music, comedy, and learning about comedy and what it takes to succeed from some of the BEST in the business. I am actually getting nervous because I have been a huge fan of each of these comedians for a very long time. I used to watch 3 of them over at Rose & Crown when I was first starting out in comedy and every Monday night was spent laughing my head off. (Thanks to Drennon Davis, Jason Downs, Dave Burleigh, and John Hoogasian for being brilliant.)

First up, we have a favorite of the JMP, Kira Soltanovich. Born in the former Soviet Union, and raised by immigrant parents in San Francisco, Kira Soltanovich has plenty to laugh about. "Like most kids, my parents took me to Disneyland …not for the rides, for the lines. They assumed there’d be food at the end of them." Kira was a series regular for four seasons on Girls Behaving Badly, and has also appeared on such shows as Jimmy Kimmel Live, 3rd Rock From The Sun, and The Tonight Show with Jay Leno.

Next up on the JMP, we are delighted to have the fiercely talented, musically gifted, and extremely funny Drennon Davis alongside the adorable, lovable, charming, and super-hilarious Jason Downs!

Drennon Davis is a local celebrity. He was on Last Comic Standing, is a featured comedian on the front page of ComedyTimetv.com, is a regular at the San Francisco Punchline and the Hollywood Improv (and many other great clubs), is the creator/animator of the hilarious cartoon called “The Peeper and Giney Show”, is a featured performer in the Adolph Hitler Roast, and will soon be taking the stage at Comedy Day 2008 in San Francisco.

As a child, Jason Downs would sneak away in the middle of the night to watch The Tonight Show. Jason's dreams would come true after graduating San Francisco State University with $30,000 of debt and no job skills. Beginning his comedy career in San Francisco, Jason has become among the best comics in the bay area. Like his influences, Eddie Murphy and Sam Kinison, Jason draws his material from his personal life. While on stage, Jason shares his dramatic and outrageous stories with the audience. A unique likeability allows Jason to confess his greatest flaws in an original, aggressive, and hilarious act. A good heart and a bad mouth allows Jason to share his story of a know-it-all who knows nothing.

And finally, we are more than thrilled to bring you an amazing talent, he’s a master impressionist, and really, really good looking…Dave Burleigh with his sidekick Squid on guitar! When Dave Burleigh enters the JMP, I am going to SQUID right off my chair.


(Hmmm…I’m starting to realize that I need a man. *Sigh*)

Dave Burleigh has been amazing audiences literally all over the world with his clever and clean comedy for over 15 years. He has recently joined forces with two other successful comedians to create the Three of a Kind Comedy Tour. Dave has taken the lost art form of impressions to a new level by often inviting the crowd to offer up requests during his stand up routine, and is always looking to add new and current voices to his act. This rising star who has opened for Robin Williams, Dana Carvey, and George Lopez covers such topics as current events, sports, politics, music and everyday life, usually while incorporating one of his spot-on impressions.

Tune in! And CALL IN during Dave Burleigh's segment. CHALLENGE HIM by making requests for unique celebrity voices.

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATERADIO.COM or FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in 415-341-1199. Don't be scurrrred.










Tuesday, August 19, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, August 24

August 24th is historically a famous day. You see, we don't just educate you on matters of comedy and sexual deviance, we are sophisticated and intelligent life forms with much more depth to us than you can possibly imagine. In other words, we know how to Google shit.

Now on to your history lesson.

On August 24th, A.D. 79, Mount Vesuvius erupted, burying the Roman cities of Pompeii and Herculaneum in volcanic ash and killing 20,000. On August 24th, 1932, Amelia Earhart made her journey as the first woman to fly across the United States. But most notably, and of profound historical significance, on August 24th, 1973...Dave Chappelle was born. Happy Birthday Dave Chappelle!!! We celebrate you Dave, we celebrate Italy's rich soil for growing tomatoes (and hot men), and Amelia's flying the friendly skies.

Our first guest is Will Franken. Franken’s humor is rooted in the British sketch comedy tradition. Onstage, he portrays an eclectic mix of characters through a series of interconnected vignettes. His skits are often satirical, skewering a range of subcultures and political views. In 2005, the SF Weekly selected Franken as Best Comedian, the San Francisco Bay Guardian calls him the Best Alternative to Psychedelic Drugs, and Tribe.net named him one of the Top 25 People to Watch nationwide.

Next up, a JMP favorite! Tony Sparks, known to all in the SF area as the Father of SF Comedy, is one of the nicest and funniest comedians you can meet. He's also one of the best comedy hosts you could be entertained by. Wonderfully supportive to comics of all levels (newbies to veterans), he helps make stage time available to anyone who wants it. Tony Sparks is a class act when it comes to professionalism, supporting the comedy community, and bringing non-stop laughs and fun to us all. He hosts a hugely popular open mic in the SF bay area, the famed Brain Wash Café in San Francisco. This is where NO ONE gets turned down for stage time. Tony enlists the entire audience, every week, to welcome every new comedian with “A Lot of Love!!!” What? "A LOT OF LOVE!!!!!!" Tony Sparks can also be found performing comedy and emceeing shows all over the place, and he produces and promotes several shows himself.

Also on the show, we have Scotch Wichmann, a rising stand-up comedian who's zany work has been described as "eating, snorting, and freebasing . . . then reaching for the turkey baster" by the SF Chronicle. With hilariously real, raw, and spazzy takes on everything from bosses with mullets to kooky psychiatrists, he's appeared on stages like New York City's famous Gotham Comedy Club and can be seen cutting his chops weekly at San Francisco's underground Comedy Clubhouse. Scotch got his start as a writer and performance artist with his live works appearing at the L.A. Performing Arts Center, MOCA, LACE, HIGHWAYS, Santa Monica Museum of Art, DA Gallery, the Claremont Graduate School, and the University of California. A former protégé of 1970s L.A. performance art cult figure John White, Scotch co-founded L.A.'s improv Kung Fu Theatre and Fisheye Mongrel groups in the mid-90s and he works increasingly in film and TV—he played an overgrown sex baby in the indie OUTER SUNSET (2007), and literally folded himself into a killer's suitcase for the late-night TV commercial HACKSAW that received high marks from SHOOT Magazine. Following a two-year stint as a radio announcer for 1340 KKAM in Fresno, California, Scotch moved to San Francisco's untamed Tenderloin district where he helped attract a swarm of press from CNN, NBC, FOX, NPR, Maxim, the Washington Post, and the New York Times as the junkie spokesman for cracked-out coffee company Meth Coffee.

In the second hour,
Grant Lyon returns the JMP with Sal Calanni!

Oscillating between moments of hyperactivity and a laid-back surfer attitude, Grant Lyon reveals his sixth grade personality on the stage. He discovered stand-up while playing collegiate soccer at UC Santa Cruz, and unfortunately for his soccer coach, the passion of his life changed. Grant has entertained at many venues in the Bay Area, including the San Francisco Punchline, Pepperbelly’s, and Rooster T. Feathers. Oh yeah, and Grant's a total hottie.

Although the picturesque views of the Bay paled in comparison to the waterways of Cleveland,
Sal Calanni calls it home and finds solace in stand-up comedy. Sal enjoys describing his Sicilian family as he magically morphs in and out of characters right before your eyes. He also expresses his opinions about race, politics, life, and anything else that should probably never be discussed over a bottle of whiskey. Sal has appeared at the Punchline, Cobb's Comedy Club, and many more venues. And what a renaissance man! Not only is Sal a great stand-up comedian, he is also a comedy instructor at the San Francisco Comedy College, and he's a singer/guitarist/songwriter and member of the garage/punk band the Hacks! Sal is also a founding member of sketch group Tossing Alice.

It's completely uncensored, explicit, and raw. It's hilarious. It's the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta. (She's the female-version of Howard Stern. She's like Howard Stern, but with big titties.)

Tune in this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATECATRADIO.COM or FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in (that is, if you think you have the guts!) 415-341-1199

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, Aug. 10 and Aug. 17

Hello Sweet Listeners...

For the next two Sundays, we will play shows from our
Best of the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta archive. These upcoming shows are precious and wonderful, much like crack babies...but without the babies.

Highlights of the next two shows---


Sunday, August 10th: Kato Kaelin, Jeremy Brigham, Edward Hermman, Suzanna the Psychic, and Susan's Favorite Comics: Anthony Hill and Deb Campo.

Sunday, August 17th:
Burtis Cutler--the World's Shortest Redneck, Gail Jones--the Sex Therapist and Southern Belle, Fuckin' Dan Fuckin' Wilson, and the Sexy and Freaky-Deaky Lindsay Blaz!

Be entertained. Be amused. Be aroused.


Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or on the web at PIRATECATRADIO.COM, THEJOHNMILLERPROGRAM.COM and FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!


Monday, July 28, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, Aug. 3

Are you the type of person who would be curious about what it’s like to have not one, not two, but THREE testicles? Do you have Tri-Testicular Envy? Are you Tri-Testicularly Curious (Tri-Curious)? Not particularly? Do you at least enjoy hearing comedians talk about their psychological, emotional, and/or physical impairments and/or appendages? If so, then you will want to re-play last week’s show. We interviewed Chris Schiappacasse and his three special guests, all of whom live together peacefully in his underwear. (Their names are “Larry, Curly, and Blow”.) Susan ended up sexually harassing Chris with a relentless onslaught of demeaning, invasive, yet provocative questioning about his 3 little pigs in a blanket.

Big, 3-ball-smashing hugs and sloppy, wet kisses to all the comedians who came to talk about comedy, offer advice to new comics, and amuse us all--Reggie Steele, Anthony Hill, Phil Perrier, Rob Breckenridge, Sammy Obeid, Chris Schiappacasse, Robert Peterson, and Gary Penovich. Do yourself a huge favor and download the last show from http://www.fccfree.com/ because that show was off the hiz-nuts!

This week we have one hilarious redneck, he's king of the one-liners, tune in to hear Bob Johnston and find out what he's been up to. Also on the JMP, we have the very cool and funny, Dave McRae! Dave has appeared in comedy clubs all over California, most recently the Ice House in Pasadena for a live taping for the Comedy Time Network. Catch him soon on ComedyTimeTv.com! Dave also makes regular appearances at the Laugh Factory and San Jose Improv, as well as many other venues. Engaging, charming, and delightful, we are happy to have Dave in the studio to entertain us!

In the second hour, we have a WARNING: Ali Mafi will be sexually harassing Justin McClure! These laughs CAN and WILL hurt you. We are putting Ali Mafi and Justin McClure in the one room together for one whole hour. So get your Kleenexes, your hand sanitizers, your hot wet towels, your paparazzi, and your cameras.

A quote from Ali Mafi:

“I'm Ali. You probably already know me. Yes honey, I am a celebrity. What? No, I am not that fat guy from the Mighty Ducks. Good Lord... My name is Ali Mafi, I am a Stand Up Comic and student from San Francisco. I'm the world’s only funny gay, fat, Muslim. (The other gay fat Muslims are soooooo unfunny). I enjoy reading...pornographic magazines, watching television...that includes naked people, and long walks on the beach...that end in butt sex. I'm a super liberal (can ya tell?) who hates Bush...because I'm from San Francisco and its the LAW. I enjoy good friends...I LOVE JANICE...but not in a hetero-disgusting way. I have a bunch of shows coming up so message me and I'll get you the details. Only for people with sense of humor...all others, please report to any sanctioned USF event. Let's see..., what else, what else...hmmm I guess that's all for now. Wanna hear my comedy? Thought So! Check it out: www.alimafi.com.”

Justin McClure is more energy than a lightening bolt coming out of a nuclear power plant and more likeable than an ABBA disco CD at a gay pride parade. His affable presence and caustic rapid-fire wit make him an immediate fan favorite wherever he goes. Displaying unique energy and an infectious personality, Justin is as original as he is hilarious. His material ranges from edgy ramblings, observations of life, relatable topics and personal life experiences. Justin was a semi-finalist in NBC's Last Comic Standing, winner of the SJ Comedy Competition, was featured in the independent film "How to Make a Woman Laugh" (Sundance), and has performed with the top talent in the industry.

Tune in!

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATECATRADIO.COM or FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in 415-341-1199

Monday, July 21, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, July 27

First and Foreskin, we want to thank last week's guests for warming our hearts and bellies with sweet laughter. We enjoyed the comedy stylings of Brendan Lynch, Tony Sparks, Kaseem Bentley, Caitlin Gill, and Chris Burns. Fun was had by all including some silly call-in guests. You can catch the silliness anytime by downloading the shows from http://www.fccfree.com/.

Now..is it getting hot in here or is Sammy Obeid coming to the JMP? Oh yeah that's right, first up on the JMP this week, we are proud to bring you the charming and funny Sammy Obeid alongside a very "special" guest. Sammy Obeid was this year's FIRST PLACE WINNER of the Rooster T. Feathers Comedy Competition, performs with the Co-Exist Comedy Tour, and hosts the lively Mission Pizza Comedy Showcase in Fremont. He is funny, talented, AND young and hot, which makes him major cougar-prey. Listen to Susan sexually harass him.

Next is our "special" guest. His last name is 13 letters long. He has a 7- foot bong. Not only that...he has THREE testicles, people. (I'm betting he can hold that bong up pretty well on that huge, 3-ball sack of his!) He likes to discuss matters of weed and hookers openly. Sammy Obeid calls him "muse". (We shall find out why.) Ladies and gentleman, may we introduce to you a legend in his own mind, the wonderfully infamous (and famous to a select, lucky few) Chris Schiappacasse. (That's "Shee - Ya - Pah - KAH *- Say").

Also on the program... Robert Peterson and Gary Penovich!

Robert Peterson's comedic style has been described as funny (by his friends) and even dry, with hints of oak and cherry. (He should stop playing those art and wine festivals!) Robert is a huge fan of observational comics such as Jerry Seinfeld and Ellen Degeneres. He tries to supply his own take on the continual weirdness that is Corporate America and Bay Area lifestyle, if only to make sense of it himself. He works in the high-tech industry, so there's usually a ready supply of the bizarre to tap into and try to make sense of.

Gary Penovich was born and raised in a small, quiet Northeastern hamlet known as New York City. His home was nestled in the quaint neighborhood of fishing boats and lighthouses, known as Sheepshead Bay. To this day, even 3000 miles away, in the hustling, bustling megalopolis of the Santa Clara Valley, if he squints his ears, he can almost hear the faint memory of those bygone Brooklyn fog horns, and the hearty cries of the local fisherman, "Are you gonna buy the fucking fish or not, lady?" Those were kinder, gentler times. And, Gary brings that same gentle kindness to his comedy act.

Finally, we are thrilled to bring out the extra big guns ...the fabulously hilarious Reggie Steele and Susan's favorite comedian in the bay area, the beloved Anthony Hill!!! WOO-HOOOO!!!!

A native of Alabama, Reggie Steele started his comedy career in the vibrant city of San Francisco and now he is considered a star on the rise in the local comedy scene. In 2007 Reggie was a finalist for NBC’s Stand-Up for Diversity Showcase, he was also featured on the second season of Martin Lawrence Presents, and in 2008 he traveled overseas to perform for the troops. He has worked with some of comedy’s brightest stars from Dave Chappelle, Ian Bagg, Arj Barker, Damon Wayans, Freddy Soto, Pablo Francisco, to Wanda Sykes and many more. He’s funny, charismatic, and smart. His natural way of telling stories and unique outlook has made him a favorite to a wide variety of audiences. Ask Reggie and he’ll say "he’s just doing what he loves to do" and that’s apparent every time he takes the stage.

Growing up in Oroville Ca. (where gravy is considered a beverage) Anthony Hill soaked in and rebelled against his redneck surroundings. As with most comedians, he was the class clown spending lots of time in the principal’s office. Anthony has performed in every major comedy club in the Bay Area including the Punchline, Cobbs Comedy Club, and the San Jose Improv, where he is considered a ‘favorite’, sharing the stage with national headliners such as Brett Butler, Maria Bamford, Willie Barcena, Robert Schimmel, Darrell Hammond, Jeff Dunham, Bob Saget, and Brian Regan. Anthony is also busy working in small clubs, corporate functions, comedy festivals, and major benefits every week of the year.

Tune in!

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATERADIO.COM or FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in 415-626-6180

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, July 20

Our ratings keep climbing wayyy higher and higher thanks to all these talented, hilarious comics coming to the studio each week for the fun and mayhem. Every week we get higher statistics of listeners, downloaders, and masturbators. We thank all our supportive listeners and all of our joyful masturbators for tuning in and turning ON baby! Yeah!

A BIG THANKS to our wonderful guests who entertained us all last week: Kurt Weitzman, Uncle Howard, Gail Jones, Burtis Cutler, Dan F'n Wilson, and Lindsay Blaz. All comics rocked the air waves and we look forward to having each of them back. If you didn't catch this show, you can listen to the archived episode (or any other episode) at
http://www.fccfree.com/.

It's a line-up of fierce talent this week on the JMP. Check this out. We have Tony Sparks, Brendan Lynch, Kevin Munroe, and Caitlin Gill. 'Nuff said. Grab your dial and roll it real nice over to 87.9 fm.

Tony Sparks, known to all in the SF area as the Father of SF Comedy, is one of the nicest and funniest comedians you can meet. He's also one of the best comedy hosts you could be entertained by. Wonderfully supportive to comics of all levels (newbies to veterans), he helps make stage time available to anyone who wants it. Tony Sparks is a class act when it comes to professionalism, supporting the comedy community, and bringing non-stop laughs and fun to us all. He hosts a hugely popular open mic in the SF bay area, the famed Brain Wash Café in San Francisco. This is where NO ONE gets turned down for stage time. Tony enlists the entire audience, every week, to welcome every new comedian with “A Lot of Love!!!” What? "A LOT OF LOVE!!!!!!" Tony Sparks can also be found performing comedy and emceeing shows all over the place, and he produces and promotes several shows himself.

Brendan Lynch has been wow-ing audiences all over the SF bay area with his extremely clever and understated, dry and dead-pan sense of humor. A brilliant writer and performer and clean-cut dresser, Brendan is an enticing pick for discerning comedy fans…as well as for the ladies! Helloooo! Brendan recently headlined the Laugh Orgy in North Beach and is also part of the Heuristic Squelch Comedy Experience and the Six Feet Excitement shows, and can be found performing in comedy venues throughout the bay area. If you are smart and love to laugh, you will love coming out to one of Brendan’s comedy shows. He is not to be missed!

Kevin Munroe is another very tall and very funny man, originally from Jamaica Mon! Kevin Munroe, Finalist in this year’s Rooster T. Feathers Annual Comedy Competition, is an amazing talent and force to be reckoned with (I reckon’)! He is also just a really cool person, always nice and supportive to other comics in the area, extremely professional, and might I add HILARIOUS. You can catch Kevin at all the major comedy clubs and he makes regular appearances at the SF Punchline.

A rising talent in the San Francisco comedy scene, people are talking about
Caitlin Gill. Most of those are people stuck in conversations with her father, who is really, really excited about his daughter telling dirty jokes in clubs. Since beginning her career in May of 2007, Caitlin has performed all over town, the San Francisco Punchline, the Purple Onion, 12 Galaxies, Club Deluxe, 50 Mason, and the Comedy Station, to name a few. She is also the host of the "For Ladies Only" Open Mic at the Brainwash, and "For Ladies Only" Showcase at Club Deluxe. Her style twists her personal experiences into engaging bits and stories, and drops phrases in your ear that will later litter your lexicon. Check out her calendar to see her live! Her videos are coming soon, chill.

Tune in and we'll turn you on!

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATECATRADIO.COM , FCCFREE.COM or THEJOHNMILLERPROGRAM.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in 415-341-1199

Thursday, July 10, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, July 13

This Sunday, we're a little bit country and a little bit rock-n-roll! That's right, John and Susan become the mischievous alter egos of Donny and Marie Osmond....minus the purple socks, minus the incest...but add the Coors.

Two comedians this week are a little bit of country (not counting John) and the other three are a little bit Rock-N-Roll. First up on the JMP, we have classic rock mixed with hotness: Brendan Lynch is on the program again!

Brendan Lynch is HUGE in the Bay Area comedy scene, and not just because he is 6’6” ! A proud Santa Cruz native, Brendan has been WOW-ing audiences all over the area with his extremely clever and understated, dry and dead-pan sense of humor. A brilliant writer/performer and clean-cut dresser, Brendan is an enticing pick for discerning comedy fans…as well as for the ladies! Helloooo! Brendan recently headlined the Laugh Orgy in North Beach and is also part of the Heuristic Squelch Comedy Experience and the Six Feet Excitement shows, and can be found performing in comedy venues throughout the bay area. If you are smart and love to laugh, you will love coming out to one of Brendan’s comedy show. He is not to be missed!

Next up on the JMP...two Southern Comfort Comics, (hey-- that should be the name of a redneck comedy troupe, shouldn't it?) the charming redneck duo, Burtis Cutler and Gail Jones.

Burtis Cutler (A.K.A. "The World's Shortest Redneck") has stocked up his trailer and packed up his cooler with dozens of punchlines and dozens more fishing lines. He's so funny he makes us spit foamy Coors out of our noses! Wonderfully delightful and down-to-earth, expect a lot of laughs from Burtis Cutler as he shares with us many hilarious tales from life in the south.

Gail Jones is a recovering Southern Belle from a little bump in the road town called Hartselle, Alabama. In the late 70’s, she started doing lectures on sex education. She was surprised to find that she had a knack for making people laugh and putting the audience at ease. She combines the insight and humor that she gets from her "day job" as a sex therapist with the laughs and pain of being an older single person in the dating world. Frankly, she’s a relationship therapist that has decided that relationships are "too durn hard."

Gail was a Semi-Finalist in the Rooster T. Feathers Comedy Competition, as well as a finalist in the Battle of the Bay Comedy Competition. You can occasionally catch her TV debut on The New Detectives in the episode Up from the Grave on The Discovery Channel, where she killed a woman for thirty thousand dollars. Gail says she’s done worse for less. She has also co-written two children’s books as well as produced and hosted a cable access show, Let’s Talk About Sex and Loving where she won a BACE Award and WAVE Award. Described as the "Phyllis Diller of the 21st Century," Gail brings her background in lecturing improv, acting and writing to venues all over California where she keeps her audiences laughing all the way home.

Next up on the JMP, it's all Rock-n-Roll, kicked up a notch with some Death Metal and Punk Rock! We have none other than Dan Fuckin' Wilson and Lindsay Blaz on the show!

Struttin' her stuff in her high heels, skin-tight jeans, and brightly colored mohawk, Lindsay Blaz has slammed into the violent mosh pit we call the San Francisco comedy scene! She's a super funny up-and-coming comedian from Santa Cruz and she's a really cool chick, so let's show her a lot of love and welcome her into the mix. Lindsay hosts a popular and very fun comedy show in downtown Santa Cruz at the Blue Lagoon on Thursday nights.

Whether it's the light-hearted and goofy side of life, or the dark and mundane, chances are Dan F'n Wilson will find a way to put a humorous twist on the topic. Dan's comedy is a no-holds-barred look at everything from politics and pop culture, to relationships and his own family life. Being a native of the San Francisco Bay Area has given his comedy a diverse edge with a unique viewpoint that few other comedians share. Mix his personal take on the world with a high-energy delivery that few are able to match, and you get an explosive look at the world through the eyes of one of the most entertaining performers to come out of the bay area in many years. Dan makes his home in the East bay, and is a regular performer at some of the biggest clubs around Northern California.

Tune in!

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATERADIO.COM or FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in (just do it, come on, don't be shy) 415-626-6180

Monday, June 30, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, July 6th

July 6th is going to be the perfect night to unwind by the radio.
July 6th is going to be the perfect night to …undress…by the radio.
July 6th is going to be the perfect night to ………make sweet comedy love, ORGY STYLE…on the radio. (Please remember to keep your private parts away from the electrical sockets.)

Yes that’s right. ORGY STYLE. (This is much like Animal Style, only slightly less mustard and slightly more groans.)
We’re having an orgy...with the pan-handlers outside, but still!! A very sexy orgy nonetheless. Instead of handing out change, we’ll be handing out apricot-flavored lube (crack-scented), and we'll be facilitating sweaty, sexual events on the sidewalk. Any takers? Who wants to be the fluffer?

Don’t you think you’ll feel sexy this Sunday? No? Why the heck not? Do you think you’re going to be too exhausted, sunburned, and hung-over from your Fourth of July weekend? Is that what the prediction is? Is this based on some sick, drunken, yet patriotic annual pattern you’ve got going? So what you’re saying is, you’re predicting you might screw up and miss one of the best shows you’ve ever heard?? REALLY? What is your problem?


Are you going to be all bloated and lethargic from drinking too many Coors (“Ceurs”) and eating too many charred up marshmallows and slimy, limp hot dogs? Are you going to be too depressed because you spent all your money on gas, Doritos, and babysitters trying to get away from it all? The job? The in-laws? Those noisy neighbors and no-boundary-havin’ roommates? But all you did was just sit in traffic and you didn’t even get laid?

July 6th is a special day. Aside from being the birthday of Merv Griffin, Nancy Reagan (Just Say NO!), and 50 Cent…(Hey what do you think he will buy himself on his birthday? A George Foreman Tooth Grill?), we are celebrating our nation’s Independence Day, although a couple days belated. Because you know what? That’s just how we roll. Let's just say that some people on the program may be drinking (and pleading) the 5th.


First up, John and Susan will enjoy Dave McRae and Gary Penovich. Dave McRae is a touring headliner, a regular at the Ice House in Pasadena and the San Jose Improv, and brings the funny to stages all over the darn place. Gary Penovich is a regular at the Blue Rock Shoot in Saratoga and Rooster T. Feathers in Sunnyvale, and appears at many other comedy venues and corporate events around the Silicon Valley area (or within a five mile radius of his wife). :-)

Finally, John and Susan welcome Sammy Obeid and Chris Schiappacasse (that's "Shee - Ya - Pah - KAH *- Say") to the studio. Sammy Obeid was this year's FIRST PLACE WINNER of the Rooster T. Feathers Comedy Competition, performs with the Co-Exist Comedy Tour, and hosts the lively Mission Pizza Comedy Showcase in Fremont. Chris Schiappacasse is one very "interesting" character sure to delight, entertain, amuse, shock, and disturb you. (He is likely the one who will have his penis caught in the electrical socket.) Our goal on this show will be to get Chris to change his name for the benefit of comedy emcee's and bookers everywhere (it's a very difficult last name, that's all I'm saying), and maybe he will even step up to the role of the aforementioned "fluffer".

Tune in!

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm to midnight!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATERADIO.COM or FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in (just do it, come on, don't be shy) 415-626-6180



Monday, June 23, 2008

The John Miller Program with Susan Maletta, June 29

Summer's heating up and so is the scalding hot talent coming to the JMP studio this Sunday night. It's literally going to be hotter than Satan's balls up in here. Do you understand this? That's right, we are cookin'. Sizzlin'. We are fryin' like chickens-n-potatoes and barbeque-in' like ribs-n-hot links. So put on your banana hammocks, pull up a lawnchair, put your bib on, crack open a cold "Ceurs", grab an ear of buttery corn (cuz we love it corny), and have yourselves a listen.

John and Susan welcome 3 hilarious local comedians Owen Good, Erikka Innes, and Scotty Fell.

Susan claims Owen Good should be called “Owen Funny” but his credit card companies have a different name for him---“Owen Money!” Owen Good is a recovering newspaper journalist slowly being reintroduced to normal society. After years of writing for a third-grade reading level in a family newspaper, Owen's glad to move on to a more adult medium and vocabulary. His dry observations and snide commentary comes at you fast and informed, like the front page if MAD magazine took over the New York Times.

Quirky and energetic, comedian Erikka Innes delivers comedy that features snappy one-liners and stories about life as a slightly spacey but smart geek girl, and a lot of clever insights into the world around us. Her high-energy performances are a guided tour through a wonderland where D&D is the national pastime and William Shatner’s rendition of Rocket Man is the national anthem. Erikka has been on tour with Women Who Kick Comedy Butt and she also created her own comedy show ’Geek Comedy Night’. She has performed at the major clubs in the bay area, written for the television show "Fondle the Fear" and worked as a film scout for Viacom Productions. When she’s not writing or performing, she’s probably busy dreaming about being a starship captain.

Finally we have the silly and wonderfully outlandish Scotty Fell. Scotty regularly performs at venues all around the bay area. Scotty is one person who knows how to enjoy life. He loves comedy, music, travel, casinos (bad math and bright lights), dining out, performance theater, hockey, auto racing, BBQ, mixed drinks and dark beer, pizza, sex, performing in the comedy spotlight, cold weather storms, San Francisco, alternative lifestyles, religious ideology, the extreme left, and the extreme right.

Tune in!

Listen to the John Miller Program with Susan Maletta this Sunday night at 10pm!

87.9 FM in San Francisco and Los Angeles or PIRATERADIO.COM or FCCFREE.COM every Sunday night at 10pm!

Call in 415-626-6180